Happy New Year, dear hearts!

Still nursing a whopper of a cold, I am happy to say that a pin-head-sized hole in my left nostril has allowed me to breathe again and I am back at the computer compiling my new year's resolutions. While I've not always been successful at keeping them, I always do my best to make sure I improve a little with each new year.

Come to think of it, you might be interested in seeing the progress I've made through the years. Hopefully, it will be an encouragement to you in your own quest for a better life.

RESOLUTION # 1:

2002: I will read at least 12 good books this year.

2003: I will read at least 6 good books this year.

2004: I will read 2 books this year.

2005: I will finish Jonathan Livingston Seagull.

2006: I will read some articles in the newspaper this year.

2007: I will read at least one article this year.

2008: I will try and finish the comics section this year, outside of the bathroom.

RESOLUTION # 2:

2002: I will get my weight down below 160.

2003: I will watch my calories until I get below 170.

2004: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 180.

2005: I will try and develop a realistic attitude about my weight.

2006: I will work out five days a week.

2007: I will work out three days a week.

2008: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week and honk.

RESOLUTION # 3:

2002: I will not charge anything on my Macys card.

2003: I will pay off my Macys card promptly.

2004: I will pay off my Macys card promptly.

2005: I will begin making a strong effort to pay off my Macys card by 2007.

2006: I will have my Macys card paid off by 2008.

2007: I will try to pay off the interest on my Macys card by 2010.

2008: I will try to be out of the country by 2011.

RESOLUTION # 4:

2002: I will not get upset when hubby jokes about my weight.

2003: I will not get annoyed when hubby calls me "melon belly."

2004: I will not respond when hubby pinches my "love handles."

2005: I will plead insanity if hubby finds my Butterfinger stash...again.

2006: I will not be offended if hubby buys me another Weight Watchers membership for our anniversary.

2007: I will try to make up with hubby.

2008: I will try to make bail.

RESOLUTION # 5:

2002: I will learn a foreign language.

2003: I will buy a book on French cooking.

2004: I will learn a foreign language.

2005: I will try to converse with a Mexican.

2006: I will learn a foreign language.

2007: I will learn to speak Chinese.

2008: I will order some Chinese food.

RESOLUTION # 6:

2002: I will walk a mile.

2003: I will walk a mile every day for a week.

2004: I will walk a mile every day for a month.

2005: I will walk a mile every day for a year.

2006: I will stop walking, follow the breadcrumbs and see if I can find my way back to Georgia.

2007: I will walk a mile on a treadmill.

2008: I will make certain the treadmill is plugged in.

Well, that's about as far as I've gotten on my list for this new year, however, there were a few resolutions I made that had to be deleted: to spend less time at the computer, more time writing old-fashioned letters, and to be kinder to my friends and small animals. I kept those resolutions. For six whole days.

And then I broke them. All of them. I feel bad about that, really bad. Not because I broke them, but because I wasted six whole days.

So if you aren't able to follow through on your resolutions, don't be discouraged. Consider a popular definition of the word resolution: something that goes in one year and out the other.

A brand new year, where auld acquaintance be forgot.

(Unless of course, those tests come back positive.)