Dear Hearts and Gentle People

There is a type-written letter from a disgruntled reader that I keep in the hope-chest my mother-in-law gave me. It is postmarked March, twothousand something or other.

I saved it for a reason. I take it out and read it every now and then to remind myself that for every person who says something nice about my columns there are probably ten who think everything I write is mindless drivel.

They may be right.

I also go back every now and again and re-read old columns. Some of them make me wince, and some of them make me think that, as did the author of the anonymous letter, "[Mrs. McGee] spends entirely too much time talking about her family."

And, I'll be honest with you, some of my columns actually make me laugh as if somebody else had written them. I'm most proud of those.

I am also proud of the ones that evoke sweet memories of Lincolnton past, of folks who "lived and loved in my hometown" and have either gone on to the Promised Land [Athens], to heaven, or to other parts of the country. Some of my articles are about those old folk who are still around, welcoming change...some with open minds, some kicking and screaming. Some are today's movers and shakers whose innovative ideas have made Lincoln County a haven for young couples, retirees, and pleasure seekers alike.

They make good copy. God bless 'em all.

I was asked a couple of years ago by the owner of one of the McDuffie County papers if I would consider writing for his paper. He was kind enough to tell me I'd never even have to come in to work; I could just email my columns directly to the newspaper office (which is what I do now, by the way.) I declined.

I declined, not because I was too busy or because I wasn't satisfied with the salary but because I don't know the people in McDuffie County. I wasn't born there; neither did I grow up there. I have no knowledge of its history nor the plans for its future, therefore, I would have one heck of a hard time trying to connect with that paper's readers, and they with me.

I know Lincoln County as well as any 59 year old native can and as long as my "recollecter" is still functioning I'll keep dredging up the past from time to time in hopes of lighting that spark of remembrance in some of you who are, let's face it, older than dirt. I've lived long enough to appreciate the things and the people who were here long before most of us were even born.

Reverend Lee Buice used to say "You can no more talk about something you don't know than you can come back from somewhere you've never been." I understand what he meant.

If I talk about my family tree, its saps and its nuts, then you either have to bear with me or toss part of the paper in the trash along with your Lincoln County tax bill. Your choice.

Of course, the main reason I write this column is simply this: It's therapy. Cheap therapy. I've been to doctors who've charged $150 an hour to have me rehash my childhood in an effort to discover what makes me tick. Telling all of you about it is much more therapeutic and I can do it in my pajamas.

It's free, it's weekly, I'm happy, my mama's happy, and you're only out 50 cents.

Now, that's all I'm going to say about that.

~ ~ ~ ~

Ever read those personal ads in the bigger newspapers? The ones that are designed for people who are looking for companionship?

A friend of mine from Hoschton, Georgia (just a few miles west of the Promised Land) sent me a few that were supposedly written by a few senior citizens in Florida. Enjoy.

FOXY LADY:

Sexy, fashion-conscious bluehaired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:

Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW:

I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga, and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy the quiet.

WINNING SMILE:

Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob, and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES:

I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES:

I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION:

Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition but walks without a cane.

'Til next time, dear hearts, ponder this:

We wouldn't worry so much about what others think about us if we knew how seldom they did.